LYRICS

PIRATE 1: Ahoy, there.
PIRATE 2: Shiver me timbers!
PIRATE 3: I have the hiccups!
PIRATE 1: What shall we do today?
PIRATE 2: I think we should plunder!
PIRATE 3: I think we should have a party!
PIRATE 1: Okay! Let's do both!
ALL PIRATES:

WE ARE PIRATES OF THE SEA
WE ARE PIRATES, YOU AND ME
AND WE'RE GOING TO
A PIRATE JUBILEE

THAT'S RIGHT, WE'RE PIRATES OF THE SEA
AND WE PIRATES GUARANTEE
WHEN THE WINDS PREVAIL
WE'RE OFF AND SAILING FREE

CUZ A PIRATE'S EVER BOUND
IF A TREASURE CAN BE FOUND
AND IF SOMEONE'S IN THE WAY
WE'LL JUST DISEMBOWEL HIM.

CUZ WE'RE PIRATES OF THE SEA
EV'RY PIRATE CAN AGREE
THAT A PIRATE FIGHT'S
AN AWESOME SIGHT TO SEE

HOW MUCH MORE PIRATE CAN WE BE?

YARRGH!

PIRATE 4: Look there! A ship! A nice, one too.
PIRATE 1: Is that a Norwegian?
PIRATE 2: Nay, 'tis a Royal Caribbean, ripe for plunder.
PIRATE 3: Oh, good. I could really use a spa treatment.
PIRATE 1: We'll take the whole ship.
ALL PIRATES:

FROM THE GALLEY TO THE DECK
IT'LL ALL BE TURNED TO WRECK
EV'RY SCURVY KNAVE
WILL WANT TO SAVE HIS NECK!

NO, YOU DON'T WANT TO RUN AFOUL
OF A PIRATE ON THE PROWL
CUZ WE'RE IMPOLITE
WE'VE GOT A FRIGHTFUL GROWL

LET THE JOLLY ROGER FLY
TAKE THE LOOT AND WAVE GOODBYE
DON'T ATTEMPT TO SAVE THE DAY,
CUZ WE'LL DISEMBOWEL YOU.

SO LET'S SEE WHAT WE HAVE GOT
I WOULD BET IT'S QUITE A LOT
HOW'D THE PIRATES FARE
THROUGHOUT THE DARING PLOT?
LET'S DRAW AN X AND MARK THE SPOT

PIRATE 1: Well, that didn't go very well. We didn't get anything.
PIRATE 2: And we lost Pirate #3!
PIRATE 4: Is he dead?
PIRATE 2: No, he's getting a hot stone massage!
PIRATE 1: We'll have to make a second attempt.
PIRATE 4: And I'll get to use this coupon for a free appetizer.
Lights up on TOM who mimics (though actually controls) the motions of the Pirates. They are in his imagination.
TOM & PIRATES:

WE ARE PIRATES OF THE SEA
LIKE THE PIRATES ON T.V....

Two mean kids approach him
MUFFY: What do you think you're doing?
TOM & PIRATES:

THAT'S RIGHT, WE'RE PIRATES OF THE SEA…

MEAN KID 2: You look like you're doing something stupid.
MURPHY: Yeah playing alone by yourself, duh.
TOM & PIRATES:

CUZ A PIRATE'S EVER BOUND
WHERE A TREASURE CAN BE FOUND…

TOM:

AND IF SOMEONE'S IN THE WAY
WE'LL JUST DISEMBOWEL THEM

He lunges for them
MUFFY: Whoa! He wants to fight!
MURPHY: Do it. No one's looking.
They fight. Elise comes on.
ELISE: Hey, stop!
TOM: You ripped my shirt!
MURPHY: If you tell on us, you're dead.
They leave.
ELISE: They're such idiots. Are you okay? What were you doing?
TOM: Nothing.
ELISE: Nothing?
TOM:

AND A PIRATE FIGHT'S
AN AWESOME SIGHT TO SEE.
HOW MUCH MORE PIRATE CAN WE BE?

ELISE: Huh? What's that song?
TOM: Nothing. I mean…
He starts to go off.
ELISE: But… Tom, don’t just run away.
TOM: Thanks, Elise.
ELISE: Come back! Teach me that song!
ALL PIRATES:

HOW MUCH MORE PIRATE CAN WE BE?

Pirates exit

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